Rotator Cuff Tear

So I’m not sure if the new medicine is making my body less able to take care of itself but my right shoulder is hurting me really bad, I can’t raise my arm, or reach for things, when I bend my elbow I can’t raise it at mid level.

I had an x-ray that shower the tear and they want me to go see and surgical orthopedic to make sure that it’s just a tear not full break. At least I can hopefully get some meds that will make it feel better. I can’t even pick up my son because my arm takes over control and hurts so much.

I also wonder if anyone else has ever had a rotator cuff issue and what did they do?

I’m going to go to bed it’s 10 minutes to 3am.



Onto the next problem

So I have taken this new medicaine and it has been working so far but this morning when I woke up my right hand was asleep and that is my dominent hand. I was going to look into boxing to get some exercise in and now with a numb hand I can’t do that. I’m so tired of things happening and then getting better for the next issue to arise. I’m done with M.S I just can’t take the bipolar issues of it. Just when I think by June my husband and I can talk about having another child it gets a little bit worse or changes and I hate that!!

I just want to play with my son like a normal mother. Is that too much to ask?


So I think I’m feeling the fatigue from the medicine that they gave me for my M.S. I feel tired a lot and with a 3 year old I don’t sleep that much anyway. I would hope that my husband would take up the slack but there are times that he just has this spacey look on his face like I said something to him in another language. He did let me sleep in and I was able to not have to get up and get our son. I’m going to stay up late and see how long he stays up. He has to get this paperwork done before tomorrow so he could give it to them. I’ve been tired a lot and tonight as I was driving home I asked him if he could drive because I was falling asleep. He asked me if I took something! Really? I’m just tired, I seem to be tired a lot now. I’ll have to find out if it’s a medicine thing or not. There are times when I’m not tired and then there are times when I am really really tired and I can’t seem to get myself up and running.

I’m so over this

So the past few days have been really nice. My husband has been loving and I have been loving back. Since I’ve done the infusion I’ve been feeling a wide variety of emotions and physical issues. I’ve some headaches, abdominal pain, leg pain, and some stomach issues that have been actually kid of painful. I am able to walk better and it feel strange having been off my foot for 10 months and start to walk on it again feels like I should be careful.

Mu husband has been asking how I feel and has been there to help me out during the day since he still trying to find a job. He still talks about baby number 2 and I’m sure if I want another child. There are so many questions that I don’t have answered yet and I think I should find out if that happens what we should do. I don’t want to have a child on a medication that has no information on it. I would rather not be there test subject. That’s one of the reasons that I don’t go on new medications because of all the side effects that may happen and some of them might be severe.

I’m taking chances with this one and we will see what happens from here on out.

I can’t believe what he just said!!!

I’ve had my flare up since April 2017 and it’s now February 2018, he takes up the entire basement with his business and looking for a job but I also do things on my computer. He finally figured out what he was trying to learn and came out of that area he went into now and asked where is dinner, what are we having??

We live in basement and there is no stove or oven and we have to go upstairs to cook anything unless you want it in the microwave. I usually don’t like processed food but that it pretty much what we can eat right now. I love him but the tone of how he said usually at this time you have food ready for me. Hey you stay up until 2am and then expect me to do everything….I’m in the middle of a rough flare up. My legs are killing me and I have no meds to help until the 16th. Even though  he asks me every morning to get up with out son, I ask him and funny enough he has some kind of excuse so that I have to get up, then he precedes to lay in bed and sleep until around 11. I’ve tried to get him to wake up early but I’m meet with B.S. How am I supposed to enforce with help when he just does what he wants anyway. If our son gets on his nerves he’ll go in the bathroom to get away from him. I ca’t imagine what does to our son, nothing good I know. I guess I Have to bring up that point to him.

Can’t do any better

So if your following me which I don’t think anyone is, can you tell my self-esteem is crap. I am really having a hard time dealing with my husband so suggested to him to go to the library and he can do his work and not be bothered, he said he would home at 3:30 and not to my surprise it’s after 5 pm. I just think that he really wants to change. I guess he told me last night when he woke me up to wake him at 8 am, I was half asleep and when morning came like normal I let him until around 11 am like he has been doing for days. Why ask me to wake him just set an alarm. Even if try wake him he just tells me 5 more mins. Which as I keep trying turns into another hour. I cleaned the bed and out new sheets on the bed because my husband hasn’t in months and I don’t like sleeping on sheets that move. I have to ask him to wash dishes and he’ll say yes but never do them. I just need some help because I’m in pain and nothing is helping. I just get so mad.

Want a life

Since I’ve been a little kid we moved around a lot and didn’t get the chance to make friends, so not that I’m older things have changed and I don’t have at all. I spend my entire day stay with my son and my currently unemployed hudband. There are days when all I want ti a day all to myself to do nothin at all. Do us parents with M.S get that?

I’m in pain and my husband holds onto my pills and doles them out when I ask I hate that, because it’s like he doesn’t trust me. He is the one unsing some of my meds and it bugs me a lot. I have to go he’s in the room right mow so I can’t talk about him.